Yeah, the touch test doesn't tell you much at all. Some people's skin is thicker than others'. If you really want to get accurate, get a thermometer that has an attached probe on it. The touchless ir jobs are accurate, if you set them right, but that's tough to do. Things like bare aluminum, or the color of anodizing will affect the readings.

You can run a Neu motor with a MM esc, but there is the cogging issue. Those with lighter vehicles usually have better luck. The problem gets worse as the weight of the vehicle increases.