Quote:
Originally Posted by PBO
Ritchard is being raised by his single father. He claims to have been the victim of bullying also & alleges that he was reacting to Casey because "He abused me first ... he was like 'get to class, you idiot', all that sort of stuff," says Ritchard
I guess this illustrates the complex dynamics that surround bullying & how things may not be exactly as they seem. Casey may well have let go a remark or two - hardly deserving of anything but Ritchard (probably with subsequent education & conditioning) will now see what purchase he can gain on the situation. Why is he a bully? maybe he trying to get attention, maybe he's fighting his own demons, maybe he wants to be popular etc hard to know
Everyone has experiences where they are bullied in some way...you learn from these & develop skills to assert yourself or mitigate the risk
I had a kid at school who wanted the attention of his parents & popularity so he thought he'd try the bullyboy routine with me. I have long arms, a lot longer than his & I pinned him against a wall by his throat for a long time. He was flailing around kicking & punching (my arm) but the more he did the tighter I squeezed, the less he did the looser my grip...anyway after a while he caught on & realised I was in control & he started crying - which at the time I thought was pretty funny (& so did the army of spectators) but it was really quiet sad. Long story short we came friends of sorts & I was able to control his bullying of others by pointing to my hand...as in 'you'll get this again if you don't stop'. He ended up in prison
Another was a much larger Tongan who was a few years older. Was a random thing but culminated in me finally taking a stand against him in front of a bus full of kids. He was shocked enough to sit back down & never bothered again
Like James, I learnt that public humiliation is a powerful tool when used in the right way
Today I manage a business & part of that is managing inter personal conflicts (& bullying to a lesser extent). Being able to empathise with people is a large part of people management & bullies last only a few minutes with me
Also my kids are going to school & dealing with these issues. My son has a disability & will be the target of bullies however he has the ability to charm the pants of most people & uses this to full effect. My daughter is quiet but very assertive & has already swiftly dealt with a few not-so-nice girls. I hope they continue to employ & learn from these skills...
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Interesting post PBO.
At 16-17 I had a friend who had been raised by his aging, alcoholic mum. His older brothers were in and out of jail. So there wasn't much hope for him. To add to the mix she was a school teacher
Some people never change hey Linc? Sounds like you haven't changed your attitude towards him. I'm not trying to knock you just point out it's hard for a lot of people to change when relationship has been forged.